Happy happy happy.
Santa Claus is coming today on his firetruck. :] I'm kind of upset that Christmas is so close, the winter pretty much sucks after break is over. I just hope the rest of the winter goes by as quickly as December has been. In a way, though, I'm not sure anymore how I feel about time; it's like the grass is always greener on the other side. I want time to slow down because I'm growing up too fast, but at the same time I don't want it to crawl by. I want to stay young but I want to grow up. I really am a walking contradiction.
I want to at least try and be productive today. I shall:
- Clean my room...somewhat
- Task three essay
- Start my ID's that are due Tuesday
- Start my outline that's due Tuesday
- Practice my song a few times
- Make 5-10 more cards
- Relax :]
The biggest eh factor is the whole cleaning thing, but I'm going to have to if I want room for Christmas stuff in a week and a half, anyway.
When 2010 comes, I think it's going to feel weird writing dates like 1/1/10..the whole /10 thing looks kinda awkward to me. Speaking of the new year, though, I'm still undecided about whether or not I'm going to have resolutions. Part of me wants to have real resolutions, and the other part of me wants my resolution to be to not have a resolution.
I've lately realized that most people don't understand why I do things the way I do. Sometimes even I don't understand myself. I think I'm okay with it though. The thought of being completely figured out is kinda scary, even though I'm sure I probably am figured out and don't even completely realize it.
I've been thinking a lot about the future and what I want to do. The fact that I really don't know anymore scares the bejesus out of me. I want to be an elementary school teacher, but I know right now it's hard to find a job on Long Island as one of those. I want to be a psychologist but I know I don't actually have the patience or nature for that job, it's also far more schooling than I really want to do. If I still want to really be a teacher and pick a subject, I'd probably pick like physics or something; it's so much easier to find a job as one of those but I don't think I want to take a bunch of math courses and have to do labs and all that. I'm so undecided. I hope I have as much time as everyone says I do.
Damn I miss that boy.
"You ever look a picture of yourself, and see a stranger in the background?. It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other peoples life have we been in. Were we a part of someone's life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died. Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone else's life, and not even know it."
Santa Claus is coming today on his firetruck. :] I'm kind of upset that Christmas is so close, the winter pretty much sucks after break is over. I just hope the rest of the winter goes by as quickly as December has been. In a way, though, I'm not sure anymore how I feel about time; it's like the grass is always greener on the other side. I want time to slow down because I'm growing up too fast, but at the same time I don't want it to crawl by. I want to stay young but I want to grow up. I really am a walking contradiction.
I want to at least try and be productive today. I shall:
- Clean my room...somewhat
- Task three essay
- Start my ID's that are due Tuesday
- Start my outline that's due Tuesday
- Practice my song a few times
- Make 5-10 more cards
- Relax :]
The biggest eh factor is the whole cleaning thing, but I'm going to have to if I want room for Christmas stuff in a week and a half, anyway.
When 2010 comes, I think it's going to feel weird writing dates like 1/1/10..the whole /10 thing looks kinda awkward to me. Speaking of the new year, though, I'm still undecided about whether or not I'm going to have resolutions. Part of me wants to have real resolutions, and the other part of me wants my resolution to be to not have a resolution.
I've lately realized that most people don't understand why I do things the way I do. Sometimes even I don't understand myself. I think I'm okay with it though. The thought of being completely figured out is kinda scary, even though I'm sure I probably am figured out and don't even completely realize it.
I've been thinking a lot about the future and what I want to do. The fact that I really don't know anymore scares the bejesus out of me. I want to be an elementary school teacher, but I know right now it's hard to find a job on Long Island as one of those. I want to be a psychologist but I know I don't actually have the patience or nature for that job, it's also far more schooling than I really want to do. If I still want to really be a teacher and pick a subject, I'd probably pick like physics or something; it's so much easier to find a job as one of those but I don't think I want to take a bunch of math courses and have to do labs and all that. I'm so undecided. I hope I have as much time as everyone says I do.
Damn I miss that boy.
"You ever look a picture of yourself, and see a stranger in the background?. It makes you wonder how many strangers have pictures of you. How many moments of other peoples life have we been in. Were we a part of someone's life when their dream came true or were we there when their dream died. Did we keep trying to get in? As if we were somehow destined to be there or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone else's life, and not even know it."
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