panic prone

I need somebody. I need somebody badly. But I have nobody. I hope this can distract me, really. This isn't fair. Why does this have to happen to me? Especially now. I'm scared. I wish the fact that I only have twenty dollars to my name to Christmas shop with was the worst thing going on right now. I wish I wasn't worried as hell. It's just not fair, it's really not. Everything I've ever worried about seems so petty and stupid right now. It's not fair. This is like the worst fucking Christmas present I could ever get. This can't happen God, please. Please.