i used to be love struck, now i'm just fucked up

What is wrong with me?? I swear I have to be bipolar or something. It just doesn't make sense. Up, down, up down, up down. Only there is no in between. Happy mediums don't exist for me. It's like I'll be all the way at the top of the stairs for a few weeks, and then instead of slowly climbing down a little, I just jump. I fall, hard. Each and every time. I break a leg for a few weeks and stay all the way at the bottom, then I somehow race back up to the top. Lather, rinse, repeat. Same process. Every single time. This has to be normal. It just has to be. This has to happen to everyone. This can't be permanent. Who am I kidding, though? It probably is just me. And it probably will never go away. It isnt' fair.